The Narrow Way

One of the things I have been wrestling with lately is the realization that faith looks very different from what I imagined it would.

For much of my life, I assumed that strong faith would feel strong. I thought it would look like confidence. I imagined that people with deep faith walked through difficult seasons with a clear sense of direction and a settled understanding of what God was doing.

The longer I walk with Jesus, the more I realize how wrong I am.

Some of the strongest faith I have ever witnessed has come from people whose hearts were breaking. Some of the deepest trust I have ever seen has come from people carrying questions they could not answer. Some of the most beautiful examples of faith have come from people who kept walking with God even when the road ahead made very little sense.

I think I am beginning to understand why.

Faith was never meant to be confidence in our ability to understand what God is doing. Faith is confidence in God’s character when we do not understand what He is doing.

That sounds simple enough until life places you in circumstances where understanding feels completely out of reach.

There are moments in life when no explanation feels sufficient. There are losses that cannot be fixed by perspective. There are disappointments that cannot be solved with a Bible verse attached to a pretty background image. There are seasons where the questions seem to multiply much faster than the answers.

What I have discovered in those moments is that Jesus does not always respond the way I expect Him to.

I want explanations. I want timelines. I want Him to show me how every piece will eventually fit together so I can stop worrying about the future.

Instead, He often offers His presence.

At first, that felt soooooo frustrating to me, although I would never want to admit it out loud. Presence seemed like a strange answer to a problem that felt like it needed a solution. But over time, I have begun to understand that there are some wounds that explanations cannot heal. There are some burdens that are not made lighter by information. There are some valleys where what we need most is not an answer but companionship.

That is where Jesus has met me again and again.

Not with an explanation of why everything happened the way it did, but with the reminder that I do not have to walk through any of it without Him.

The older I get, the more I realize that one of God’s greatest gifts is not certainty about the future but confidence in His presence. Knowing He is with me changes how I carry everything. The circumstances may not immediately change, but I am no longer by myself.

There is something comforting about serving a Savior who is not intimidated by our doubts. Jesus never seems threatened by honest conversations. He does not withdraw from us when we are hurting. If anything, the Bible shows us repeatedly that He moves closer to people suffering or with broken hearts.

I find hope in knowing that I do not have to arrive at some perfect state of understanding before God can use me, love me, or walk beside me. I find hope in knowing that faithfulness is not measured by how many answers I have but by my willingness to keep trusting Him.

I am learning that His goodness does not disappear when life becomes difficult. His faithfulness is not dependent on my ability to recognize it immediately. His plans are not threatened by my confusion.

When I look back over my life, I can see countless moments where God was working long before I understood what He was doing. I suspect that years from now I will look back on this season and discover the same thing.

Until then, I will keep walking with Him, trusting that the God who has never failed me before is not about to start now.

Love you all so much,

Annie Stewart Lambert